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Balancing Connection, Independence, and Growth

Studying abroad can be an exciting and transformative experience—not only for students, but also for the family members and friends who support them. Social media, messaging apps, and video calls have made it easier and less expensive than ever to stay connected. Students can share photos, send travel updates, and call home from nearly anywhere in the world, allowing loved ones to participate in the experience from a distance.

At the same time, establishing healthy communication boundaries can help students become more fully engaged in their lives abroad. With that in mind, we offer the following recommendations.

Encourage your student to be fully present

One of the most valuable gifts families can give students while they are abroad is permission to be away. Students need to know that they are loved and supported, but they also need the freedom to become immersed in their new environment without feeling guilty about not calling or messaging frequently.

Expectations for daily—or even weekly—calls can create pressure as students attempt to “straddle two continents,” building a life in Leipzig, Oxford, or Valencia while remaining virtually involved in everything happening at home. Frequent communication may also make it more difficult for students to form relationships within their immediate community. Over time, students who regularly share their experiences with people at home may unintentionally miss opportunities to connect with the people living, studying, and traveling alongside them.

Giving students space does not mean becoming uninvolved. Rather, it allows them to engage more deeply with their surroundings and take full advantage of the academic, cultural, and personal growth opportunities of studying abroad.

Be mindful of the demands of the program

Study abroad schedules can be exceptionally busy. During a typical week, students may complete a full academic course load within a condensed schedule, keep up with assignments and projects, participate in local activities and program events, and plan independent travel involving transportation, lodging, budgeting, and sightseeing.

After a busy weekend of travel, students may return tired and immediately begin preparing for the week ahead. They may also struggle to maintain healthy routines, including getting adequate sleep.

Families can support students by recognizing these demands and avoiding additional pressure to communicate, travel, or participate in activities beyond what they can reasonably manage. Encourage your student to make thoughtful choices and maintain a healthy balance among academics, travel, relationships, and rest.

Encourage your student to embrace encounters with difference

Research suggests that much of the growth associated with studying abroad occurs through encounters with difference. Students are introduced to unfamiliar cultural values, political and economic systems, patterns of social interaction, religious traditions, and ways of understanding the world.

These experiences can be exciting, but they may also be uncomfortable or disorienting. Students may encounter ideas that challenge their assumptions or create tension between what they have previously believed and what they are now experiencing. This process can lead to meaningful reflection and help students develop a more complex understanding of themselves and the world.

Families can support this growth by listening carefully and allowing students to wrestle with difficult questions. Rather than immediately offering a solution or familiar interpretation, encourage them to reflect, remain curious, and consider what they may be learning from the experience.

Allow your student to make decisions and learn from them

One of the most powerful aspects of studying abroad is the opportunity for students to live outside their familiar support systems. In a new environment, they must learn how to navigate public transportation, communicate across language barriers, manage money, balance academics and travel, respond to cultural expectations, and make decisions about their health and well-being.

Through trial and error, students develop confidence, resilience, independence, and practical problem-solving skills that can remain with them long after the program ends.

Well-intentioned family members can sometimes interrupt this learning process by stepping in too quickly—for example, by contacting a professor about an academic concern, intervening in a roommate conflict, or attempting to resolve a conduct issue on the student’s behalf.

We encourage you to support your student by listening, offering encouragement, and providing advice when it is requested. At the same time, allow the student to retain responsibility for addressing the issue and determining the next steps. Genuine growth often requires students to experience the consequences of their decisions and work through challenges themselves.

Remember that setbacks and mistakes can be just as important as successes. Helping students recognize the value of these experiences can encourage resilience and turn a difficult moment into an important opportunity for learning.